labels, so many labels

There is a new book out that a woman wrote about seeking the one and navigating single life without losing your mind.  I didn’t include the book title here because I am not here to endorse it, nor am I ever going to read it.  After interviewing over a 100 women, the author began to think that most of them fit into one of 12 categories, which she defined as listed below.

The Soul-Mate Seeker: Someone who is doing everything she can to find The One.

The Phoenix: A woman who recently had a painful breakup and is doing everything she can to rise from the ashes in better shape.

The Organic: She prefers to leave things up to destiny and live her own life rather than hunting for men in any methodical or calculated way.

The Princess-in-Waiting: She is waiting to be rescued by a prince (who sure is taking his royal time).

The Late Bloomer: The rest of her life is on hold while she waits for her future husband to appear.

The Free Spirit: She worries that she can only have one or the other — her independence or a committed relationship. (And she thinks the former is better.)

The Wedding Wisher: She suddenly finds herself fantasizing about marriage after a lifetime of not caring about it.

The Town Rebel: She no longer aspires to live the cookie-cutter lifestyle of everyone else in her community, though she once used to.

The Ritual Re-inventor: A woman who wants to get hitched but also feels very strongly about having an unconventional marriage (right down to the wedding ceremony).

The Someday-Mom: She would like to have babies someday, but wishes she didn’t feel so much biological pressure to figure it out fast.

The Slow & Steady: A woman who hopes to marry when the time is right. Meanwhile, she does her best not to cave to the massive pressure she feels from friends, family, and society.

The Trailblazer: A woman who knows married life is not for her, so she’s trying to break a new kind of path to happiness.

Which one are you?  I am a combination of a few of these.  I start as The Phoenix -> The Slow & Steady -> The Ritual Re-inventor -> The Someday Mom.  Perhaps somewhere in there is a tiny bit of The Soul-Mate Seeker (even though I hate the idea of a soul mate, except when it applies to my best friend, and really hate the term The One).  I’m not doing everything I possibly can to find him, but I am not sitting on my laurels either.



  1. You girls sure don’t have it easy! There aren’t enough “knights” out there!

    • Thanks for the comment. However, the thing is, I’m not looking for a knight in shining armour. I am more than capable in taking care of myself and I don’t need to be *saved*. I’ve been very successful in taking care of myself for many many years. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want to meet someone who is wonderful (as his own person and as part of a couple) to spend time with. I don’t need a man, I simply want one.

  2. I’m the Organic Princess in waiting. Maybe a little phoenix, but I’m not really trying to get over any one person. I think I’m a princess in waiting because I am pretty miserable where I live right now, so the fantasy of someone coming to rescue me and take me away and give me a perfect life is pretty appealing at the moment. But reality me knows I’ll have to rescue myself. I think I’m pretty much the organic person, what ever happens happens and I’m just going to live my life.

  3. Dearest Amy,
    I knew you didn’t need to be rescued and can take care of yourself…
    I was merely saying that it’s sad there are “so many Neanderthals” out there!

    And to Vendetta…you will be fine…just stay positive…

    Eleanor Roosevelt said “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

    Have a Great Day!

  4. Definitely think that I’m The Phoenix…. Everything in me desperately wants to rise and be so much better, have so much better, and know for sure that I made the right decisions that got me to some great place.

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